the difference

i really should be studying right now. but, i am beginning to realize that there is a distinct difference between should and am. right now, i am content to sit here and write for a bit.

this weekend was nothing short of interesting.

went to a free, yes FREE, street dance performance friday night. don't worry, it was within the safe confines of the konserthuset (none of that dangerous street-night-going for me). it was absolutely fabulous (couldn't resist a teensy brit. comedy allusion =)

saturday, spent some time on the phone with the ever-so helpful swedish airline woman (in case you are confused, i am not being sarcastic... she was really nice and helpful); but, ended up having to trek out to the airport anyway.

good news: got my ticket fixed for a mere $150 (much cheaper than, say, a flight to sweden in december... see katel.blogspot.com for info.).

spent the rest of the weekend doing various activities: walking, talking with theres' spanish friends, visiting nordic museum, church, attending super-weird modern dance, receiving e-mails about proficiency tests i am supposed to be taking right about now at etsu (just to show them, i decided to incorrectly form this sentence... bye-bye parallel structure!) you know, just the basic swedish weekend-ish sort of stuff.

since it has been a while since i have imparted any insightful ponderings, here is one (topic for a short story?? who knows....)

last weekend i was running rather late for church... it was freezing and rainy (i am beginning to think that these are just swedish sundays... we have only had one sunday since my arrival that wasn't overcast and nasty... perhaps the swedish weather gods feel it necessary to increase the sunday afternoon nappage... you know, in the past few years the rates have just bottomed-out...has led to cranky mondays everywhere... horrible trend... must be reversed at all costs...).

so, practically running from central station, i was still heaving when i entered the chapel (perhaps "heaving" is a bit dramatic... i was perspiring and breathing a little heavier than usual). anyways, when i walked in, it was like this huge wave flushed over me... i could feel the difference.

the absence.

though the words sounded just as foreign and lyrical as ever, the pained expressions darkening the faces of the congregation whispered softly to me.

"there is no difference."

grief has only one language and i know it well.